Written by Ruzhdi Gashi, writer and positive thinking coach
It is not always fate that brings suffering into our lives. Often, we ourselves open the doors to misfortune – not intentionally, but through the way we think, feel, and approach the world. Insecurity, fear, lack of self-confidence, and paranoia are emotions and thoughts that, unconsciously, shape our negative reality. As if we were calling upon the shadows, all the while complaining about the lack of light.
Many people live with the belief that they don’t deserve success, love, or happiness. This belief holds them back from trying, from seeking, from taking risks. They choose the safest path, but not the right one for them. This insecurity keeps them locked in a vicious cycle where everything they try to avoid out of fear ends up finding them anyway. Even when an opportunity knocks, they look at it with suspicion – as a trap, not a chance.
Fear, on the other hand, is a long-time companion of humanity. But when it becomes our permanent way of thinking, it paralyzes us. A person who fears loss often doesn’t dare to win. One who is afraid of being hurt protects themselves so much that they don’t even allow love to enter. And so, loneliness, failure, and lack of fulfillment are not consequences of the outside world – but a reflection of an inner self filled with fear.
Lack of self-confidence is another burden we carry. When we don’t believe in ourselves, it becomes difficult to trust others as well. Doubt follows us in every step, making us see danger even where there is hope. This doubt is a silent invitation for all the things we wish to avoid – because when we don’t believe we can succeed, it becomes easier to give up than to fight.
Paranoia, moreover, distorts reality. It’s like a funhouse mirror reflecting a twisted version of our consciousness. The more we feed it, the more it consumes us. We see others as threats, life as a danger, and the future as an inevitable doom. And when the mind is filled with dark scenarios, life can rarely offer us light.
At the end of the day, many of the misfortunes we experience are not accidental. They are the result of how we treat ourselves and the world around us. We unconsciously invite them – through our thoughts, emotions, and choices. But just as we have the power to invite them, we also have the power to avoid them. Everything starts with awareness. With the moment we stop and ask ourselves:
“Am I living with fear, or with faith?”
Only when we learn to believe in ourselves, to live with courage, and to look at life with open eyes, can we change the course of our destiny. Because sometimes, fate is nothing more than a reflection of our own mind.
